Starting New
I am showing up again because it is my belief that this action is the only right action. When I sit down to write a blog, I am rarely certain of what it is going to be about. I admit, the majority of the words that come out here are simply slop! To me that is the case, but it may not be the case to those who read! There is power in these words that I tell myself, for I would not be releasing any of the words otherwise!
I come here to spread a message and it is this. You can always start new from nothing! A blank page is only as daunting as writing the very first paragraph — for a paragraph, a sentence; for a sentence, a word; for a word, a letter. All are simply built on one another such as laying a brick for a house. The project only gets less daunting as you lay it brick by brick. Before you know it, you have before you a project which is nearly built! This here is usually my favorite part of being creative! It is strange, I am not rewarded as much by the final result of a project as I am the project at 95%. Strange I know, but this is where I tend to slow down. It is as if the finish line is in sight, but I slow down because I feel rewarded from the journey getting from zero to here! Then there is a feeling of dread which shortly follows, for the project is coming to an end. I know that it will once again be necessary for me to stare at a blank page, canvas, project template, foundation, or other beginning.
How does one such as me overcome such feelings? I start new. I compare this to starting a workout, or taking a cold shower! It is never a process which I enjoy, but there is a skill in performing it, oddly enough. The more that I become comfortable with it, the better I am equipped to do it again the next time. When I complete a project, I am sure that I save my template, my presets, my tools, for the very next project! Even the fanciest keyboard will never make the next blank page any easier to start! But I have started from so many blank pages that it is simply a fact of life to me at this point. I lose the feelings of attachment to projects unfinished! I find that it is okay to leave a project behind in the drafts for a later date, for I know that there was spiritual energy there, and it may come back to me. I have been able to revisit projects with a different set of conditions and it has led me to finish them! Leaving a project half written can sometimes provide me with the energy necessary to snowball into the very next one!
This current post is actually not even the first iteration of what I initially sat down to write. Something guided me here and I don’t wish to know what. I don’t wish to understand the purpose for I know that is a rabbit-hole for another day. I will go on to have different experiences tomorrow and I will pay attention to the patterns around me. Pay attention to the patterns, and let them speak to you, and eventually through you. Allow yourself to make mistakes for you can always start new.